Been singing the same song,
Over and over again,
It's a lovely song,
And for me it never ends.
Feeling low and so alone,
Beach walking blues,
Go home, wait by the telephone,
Praying for Julie's call.
Julie's in my class,
Never met a girl so fine,
Stare into her gorgeous eyes,
Just wishing she was mine.
Wish I was a player,
Lead singer in a band,
Then I'd get to walk proudly,
Holding Julie's hand.
But feeling low and so alone,
Beach walking blues,
Go home, wait by the telephone,
Praying for Julie's call.
Been singing the same song,
Over and over again,
It's alonely love song,
And for me it never ends.
But feeling low and so alone,
Beach walking blues,
Go home, wait by the telephopne,
Praying for Julie's call.
I'm praying for Julie's call - Repeat to Fade.
Thursday, 26 April 2007
Wednesday, 25 April 2007
Running Log
Monday - Hills Session
15 x 250 Metres Uphill
3 sets of 5 climbs - 5 throughout the entire session had to be run at sprint speed.
My gradual climb average was around 1:22
and my sprint times were as follows -
61, 64, 64, 67, 61. (my PB is actually 57)
I was disappointed not to go sub 60 for any sprint climbs but I had raced on Sunday so was feeling a bit rough.
Total Mileage: 4.7 Miles Approx
Tuesday - BAC Speed Session
800 Metres x 8 at the beautiful Measured Mile Park in Littledown
ran an avg of 2:42 - which wasn't bad considering it was all on grass.
Total Mileage: 7.25 Miles Approx
Wednesday - Lone Track Session - 400 Metres x 10
I was feeling shattered at 400 Metres x 3, but I finished the first set of six and then pushed myself forwards to complete the session.
Times were pretty consistent - 68, 72, 72, 74, 74, 75, 76, 74, 72, 75. Avg - 72 I think. (400 Metre PB is 57 seconds.)
I might go for a long run tonight around Littledown if the weather is good.
Only two rest days at the mo on Fri and Sun cos I'm really trying to get fit enough to do some awesome race times in the near future. I'll be pleased if I can finish the season with a sub 4:40 1500 Metres and a sub 36 10 KM.
15 x 250 Metres Uphill
3 sets of 5 climbs - 5 throughout the entire session had to be run at sprint speed.
My gradual climb average was around 1:22
and my sprint times were as follows -
61, 64, 64, 67, 61. (my PB is actually 57)
I was disappointed not to go sub 60 for any sprint climbs but I had raced on Sunday so was feeling a bit rough.
Total Mileage: 4.7 Miles Approx
Tuesday - BAC Speed Session
800 Metres x 8 at the beautiful Measured Mile Park in Littledown
ran an avg of 2:42 - which wasn't bad considering it was all on grass.
Total Mileage: 7.25 Miles Approx
Wednesday - Lone Track Session - 400 Metres x 10
I was feeling shattered at 400 Metres x 3, but I finished the first set of six and then pushed myself forwards to complete the session.
Times were pretty consistent - 68, 72, 72, 74, 74, 75, 76, 74, 72, 75. Avg - 72 I think. (400 Metre PB is 57 seconds.)
I might go for a long run tonight around Littledown if the weather is good.
Only two rest days at the mo on Fri and Sun cos I'm really trying to get fit enough to do some awesome race times in the near future. I'll be pleased if I can finish the season with a sub 4:40 1500 Metres and a sub 36 10 KM.
Summer Project Diary - Day Three - Most likely Part 1
There have been no group meetings today but seeing as there isn't yet a solid plot outline for our story, we have all decided within our group to come up with our own individual ideas based on our current simple concept. We will then decide on the one we prefer the most and which suits the brief best. This then is an outline for the story that I envision:
Ralph Tenneson, 59, rich boss of a mega bucks company has died of a heart attack. This is for many people the end of an era, which can be seen as a good thing or bad thing depending on who you ask. Ralph was seen as many different things by many different people. For some he was a ruthless tycoon who ruined people's lives and whose death will leave private smiles on the faces of some of his rivals and former employers, for others Ralph was a warm hearted man who made people's lives more pleasant and rich.
The first story follows his wife who is understandably devestated by her husband's death and cries by his side. Judtih and Ralph had been together for numerous years and had loved each other very much throughout those years together.
The second story follows one of Ralph's two children, Megan, as she hears word of the news by phone. The conversation is quick before Megan puts the phone down and smiles. She laughs hysterically before making her way outdoors.
The third story is shot documentary style with a series of interviews amongst a mixture of people who explain in turn why they either liked or disliked Mr Tenneson. They all admit despite their opinions of the man that things are going to change now that he has gone. For some, who felt they were bullied by Mr Tenneson and who didn't repsect his decisions say that they now they feel free and that they will come to work each day feeling a lot happier. The people however who were close to Mr Tenneson and admired the way he worked say that this is the end of an era - and that it is going to take a lot to recover from his loss. Footage is cut between people chatting away in quite animated fashion about their disgust and disdain for the man and talking brightly about the future of the company and between interviews with people nearly in tears whilst talking about his loss.
The fourth and final story is a small news report about Ralph, talking about his life and how he split people's opinions down the line throughout his rich career. He talks about the troubles he had in his personal life with his children who he hasn't seen for many years and how his death will bring both joy and sorrow amongst a variety of different people.
The film closes with a picture of the man himself.
This still needs plenty of work but as a rough concept I think it is quite a nice idea. The main things I need to think about really are the details of the man himself. Why does he have so many friends and foes? Why has he not seen his children for so many years and why is one of them insanely pleased to hear news of his death. Although I don't need to show why these things have happened, it is important to know why myself so that I can understand the emotional drive of the characters involved within the story. I will develop this idea later and write a character biography of Ralph Tenneson to go with a more detailed plot outline.
Even if this idea isn't selected I am going to do a complete plan for the story because I might want to do it myself at a later date.
Ralph Tenneson, 59, rich boss of a mega bucks company has died of a heart attack. This is for many people the end of an era, which can be seen as a good thing or bad thing depending on who you ask. Ralph was seen as many different things by many different people. For some he was a ruthless tycoon who ruined people's lives and whose death will leave private smiles on the faces of some of his rivals and former employers, for others Ralph was a warm hearted man who made people's lives more pleasant and rich.
The first story follows his wife who is understandably devestated by her husband's death and cries by his side. Judtih and Ralph had been together for numerous years and had loved each other very much throughout those years together.
The second story follows one of Ralph's two children, Megan, as she hears word of the news by phone. The conversation is quick before Megan puts the phone down and smiles. She laughs hysterically before making her way outdoors.
The third story is shot documentary style with a series of interviews amongst a mixture of people who explain in turn why they either liked or disliked Mr Tenneson. They all admit despite their opinions of the man that things are going to change now that he has gone. For some, who felt they were bullied by Mr Tenneson and who didn't repsect his decisions say that they now they feel free and that they will come to work each day feeling a lot happier. The people however who were close to Mr Tenneson and admired the way he worked say that this is the end of an era - and that it is going to take a lot to recover from his loss. Footage is cut between people chatting away in quite animated fashion about their disgust and disdain for the man and talking brightly about the future of the company and between interviews with people nearly in tears whilst talking about his loss.
The fourth and final story is a small news report about Ralph, talking about his life and how he split people's opinions down the line throughout his rich career. He talks about the troubles he had in his personal life with his children who he hasn't seen for many years and how his death will bring both joy and sorrow amongst a variety of different people.
The film closes with a picture of the man himself.
This still needs plenty of work but as a rough concept I think it is quite a nice idea. The main things I need to think about really are the details of the man himself. Why does he have so many friends and foes? Why has he not seen his children for so many years and why is one of them insanely pleased to hear news of his death. Although I don't need to show why these things have happened, it is important to know why myself so that I can understand the emotional drive of the characters involved within the story. I will develop this idea later and write a character biography of Ralph Tenneson to go with a more detailed plot outline.
Even if this idea isn't selected I am going to do a complete plan for the story because I might want to do it myself at a later date.
Tuesday, 24 April 2007
Summer Project Diary - Day One
Today we had a meeting with our Summer Project groups. We discussed the brief and thought about what the words 'End of Empire' could mean on quite a broad scale. Rather than something epic we decided it was probably better to use the word as a metaphor, like the empire being the end of authority or command on quite a small or personal scale such as a girl breaking free from her family or a man going against a set of cultural values. We also thought at first about making the the subject matter positive as this would be an interesting take on what intitially sounds like a fairly negative idea.
When we had finished the meeting with our advisor our group got together and tried to form a solid idea for the project. We all had different takes on what the story could be about. The first solid idea to be brought up was about a man quitting his job, the company for him feeling like a dominating empire, and him quitting feeling like a great escape and freedom from his own personal hell. To give the story more depth I added the idea of making references to epic stories so that the audience would recognise that the man's freedom is to him quite an epic experience akin to the abolishment of slavery in more classical terms and not just a bored and frustrated man who is fed up with his job.
This was one idea. We went on to discuss further ideas and through discussion the basic concept and dramatic form of the story has begun to take its shape. The main theme will be death. Although this is a negative idea, it can also have postive implications and we have decided to show death in two different lights, its good and bad points in terms of end of life and rebirth.
Six different stories will be shown to show why the man's death has had a contrasting impact and provoked seperate thoughts and feelings amongst different people.
This is still only a very brief idea and we hope to develop it further very soon.
In terms of group dynamic, we are all contributing to ideas very well so far as well as being sensitive to the voices of other group members. We were a little static at first but we soon warmed to each other's company and our enthusiasm for the project soon inspired us all to speak up about our ideas.
When we had finished the meeting with our advisor our group got together and tried to form a solid idea for the project. We all had different takes on what the story could be about. The first solid idea to be brought up was about a man quitting his job, the company for him feeling like a dominating empire, and him quitting feeling like a great escape and freedom from his own personal hell. To give the story more depth I added the idea of making references to epic stories so that the audience would recognise that the man's freedom is to him quite an epic experience akin to the abolishment of slavery in more classical terms and not just a bored and frustrated man who is fed up with his job.
This was one idea. We went on to discuss further ideas and through discussion the basic concept and dramatic form of the story has begun to take its shape. The main theme will be death. Although this is a negative idea, it can also have postive implications and we have decided to show death in two different lights, its good and bad points in terms of end of life and rebirth.
Six different stories will be shown to show why the man's death has had a contrasting impact and provoked seperate thoughts and feelings amongst different people.
This is still only a very brief idea and we hope to develop it further very soon.
In terms of group dynamic, we are all contributing to ideas very well so far as well as being sensitive to the voices of other group members. We were a little static at first but we soon warmed to each other's company and our enthusiasm for the project soon inspired us all to speak up about our ideas.
Monday, 23 April 2007
Summer Project Diary - Day One
Today we were given the brief for the Summer Project. As this term we will be working with students from the interactive media course as well as students from the television course, we watched some clips and viewed websites of popular television shows which have cleverly used the world of the web to widen their programme's appeal. They have done this through making the website appear like a slice of life for the programme in hand with blogs, video diaries and countdowns to the next shows which invovles the audience with the programme much more than it would with just words on a page. I found this quite imformative and interesing as it made me think about the influence that websites can have in the media industry. When I am watching a show on television I don't tend to think about shows and their websites, but today was a reminder of just how important and intelligent they can be. For example, I found out that the show Smallville in which there is a daily newspaper article written about the goings on in the town, actually exists in fictional form on a website. This is quite clever, because it gives the program a realistic feel and makes it appear so much more than just a sixty minute show that they tune in to watch for an hour of their lives once every week. Fans like to immerse themselves in programmes, for the shows to become an important part of their everyday live. This quest is fulfilled by websites which allow them to do so.
At the end of the lecture we were taught about the importance of being able to collaborate well and share ideas and thoughts with our random group members. I think this should be a good expereince as it it is very much like the industry, where people work with other people they might not know or even like but manage to work well together in spite of these issues to produce excellent pieces of work. This will be a challenge, and albeit a very important challenge as it will give me a taste of what the life of a scriptwriter can be like.
In the brief we were told simply that our subject matter was to do with the 'End of Empire.' Immediately my thoughts turned to images susch as the crumbling of the Roman empire but as the day has passed I have realised how broad this subject matter can be. I looked up the word empire in an online thesaurus to see how wide the subject of empire could spread.
Here are the results that came back:
authority, command, commonwealth, control, domain, dominion, federation, government, kingdom, people, power, realm, sovereignty, supremacy, sway, union.
Based on these definitons for the word empire, I have come up with numerous plot scenarios that could suit the subject matter having previously believed this to be a very complex task. A man quitting his job, the miner's strike, a town hero losing his touch. They are stories that are all relevant to the brief and all of which could be devleoped into six minute story ideas.
I still have no idea what the film is going to be about and I am still racking my brains thinking of something suitable for the subject brief but tomorrow I am hoping me and my partner will come up with something creative and which also sits well with the rest of the group. The next few weeks could be quite hectic, but fun and challenging all the same.
At the end of the lecture we were taught about the importance of being able to collaborate well and share ideas and thoughts with our random group members. I think this should be a good expereince as it it is very much like the industry, where people work with other people they might not know or even like but manage to work well together in spite of these issues to produce excellent pieces of work. This will be a challenge, and albeit a very important challenge as it will give me a taste of what the life of a scriptwriter can be like.
In the brief we were told simply that our subject matter was to do with the 'End of Empire.' Immediately my thoughts turned to images susch as the crumbling of the Roman empire but as the day has passed I have realised how broad this subject matter can be. I looked up the word empire in an online thesaurus to see how wide the subject of empire could spread.
Here are the results that came back:
authority, command, commonwealth, control, domain, dominion, federation, government, kingdom, people, power, realm, sovereignty, supremacy, sway, union.
Based on these definitons for the word empire, I have come up with numerous plot scenarios that could suit the subject matter having previously believed this to be a very complex task. A man quitting his job, the miner's strike, a town hero losing his touch. They are stories that are all relevant to the brief and all of which could be devleoped into six minute story ideas.
I still have no idea what the film is going to be about and I am still racking my brains thinking of something suitable for the subject brief but tomorrow I am hoping me and my partner will come up with something creative and which also sits well with the rest of the group. The next few weeks could be quite hectic, but fun and challenging all the same.
Tuesday, 17 April 2007
Short Story - To Whom it won't concern
To Whom it won't concern - 500 word Short Story
'He don't talk to me no more. At least not like he used to. My memory seems to have faded from his mind like the joy of Christmas fades from the mind of a child once he has opened all his presents.
Didn't even say hello when he arrived through the door. Three months gone away and it's like I no longer exist. Mind you I'm kidding myself if I say that we were friendly before he left. In fact for some years now it's like he's been avoiding me. And even when he did talk occasionally it would always be brief and condescending as if he were talking to a child or something. Think he must have forgotten that I'm the same age as he is. And to think that he used to call me his brother. I remember those times. Years ago and as if from a different world but I still remember. I have to. It's the memory of our beautiful friendship which is the only thing that stops my poor heart bursting whenever he gives me the cold shoulder.
Used to talk for hours as young lads. Walks through the wicked forest where we would skip ahead of the oldies and run along creating and imagining our own world. Sunday afternoons when we would sit together on the warm old couch and treat ourselves to an afternoon of the footie. You never watched a game without me. When ever you cried I remember that I was the only one you could talk to about your problems. Our laughter which was surely a statement for all the pleasure that existed in the world. Felt so nice to have someone who cared about me like that. It's not as if I got to see the world like you did. No education, no other friends, you were all I had. But if I'm honest you were all I wanted. It was like no-one else but you understood me. No one else ever spoke to me. But you were different. And now your just like them. I've got no-one to talk to anymore. I feel old and worn out. Sit in your bedroom mostly when your away looking at old photographs of us together and trying to picture where it all went wrong. My loneliness is made worse by the fact that I know what it was once like to be loved.
Last week I sat on your bed waiting for you to arrive back from a night out on the town. I just wanted to talk. To share a laugh like we had done so effortlessly in the past. You came back late waking me from a deep sleep but still I was so pleased to see you standing there looking at my face. There was some girl beside you. You said something to her in a voice I no longer understand and then you just threw me onto the floor. My old friend treating me as if I was just a toy. As if I was just some old teddy bear.
'He don't talk to me no more. At least not like he used to. My memory seems to have faded from his mind like the joy of Christmas fades from the mind of a child once he has opened all his presents.
Didn't even say hello when he arrived through the door. Three months gone away and it's like I no longer exist. Mind you I'm kidding myself if I say that we were friendly before he left. In fact for some years now it's like he's been avoiding me. And even when he did talk occasionally it would always be brief and condescending as if he were talking to a child or something. Think he must have forgotten that I'm the same age as he is. And to think that he used to call me his brother. I remember those times. Years ago and as if from a different world but I still remember. I have to. It's the memory of our beautiful friendship which is the only thing that stops my poor heart bursting whenever he gives me the cold shoulder.
Used to talk for hours as young lads. Walks through the wicked forest where we would skip ahead of the oldies and run along creating and imagining our own world. Sunday afternoons when we would sit together on the warm old couch and treat ourselves to an afternoon of the footie. You never watched a game without me. When ever you cried I remember that I was the only one you could talk to about your problems. Our laughter which was surely a statement for all the pleasure that existed in the world. Felt so nice to have someone who cared about me like that. It's not as if I got to see the world like you did. No education, no other friends, you were all I had. But if I'm honest you were all I wanted. It was like no-one else but you understood me. No one else ever spoke to me. But you were different. And now your just like them. I've got no-one to talk to anymore. I feel old and worn out. Sit in your bedroom mostly when your away looking at old photographs of us together and trying to picture where it all went wrong. My loneliness is made worse by the fact that I know what it was once like to be loved.
Last week I sat on your bed waiting for you to arrive back from a night out on the town. I just wanted to talk. To share a laugh like we had done so effortlessly in the past. You came back late waking me from a deep sleep but still I was so pleased to see you standing there looking at my face. There was some girl beside you. You said something to her in a voice I no longer understand and then you just threw me onto the floor. My old friend treating me as if I was just a toy. As if I was just some old teddy bear.
Running Blog
The Runner - What's it about?
Pain mostly. So what's so enjoyable about that then. Well for me it is the feeling of elation when you reach the finish line. The sense of achieving your goals and race aims. The race atmosphere is very exciting and so it is worth putting in the hard training to perform well in them.
Be aware of the loneliness of the long distance runner
It is very easy to put off going out running if you know you are going to be out there by yourself. Running in groups is very enjoyable especially if you reward your hard efforts with a stop to the pub afterwards. The drink tastes all the more sweeter when you've worked hard for it.
Night Time Runner
I prefer to run at night rather than during the day where the pave can be somewhat crowded and hectic. Be careful however to wait a while if your planning to go out after eating your meal. A two hour wait should be more than enough.
Escape into the Hills
I can't stand running along the main road so I try wherever possible to escape into the hills and run through quiet lanes in Holbrook and Makeney. I challenge myself on the two hills of Red Lane (about three quaters of a mile in length) and Shaw Lane (about a mile and a half.) Hill training is a great strength builder and the feeling you get when you've made it to the top makes getting there seem worth while.
Wearing the right gear
Running gear is not only extremely comfortable but it also helps you to run faster as well. Wearing a good pair of running shoes will make you feel like you are gliding along the pave rather than applying pressure to the ground.
Shirt, Shorts, Shoes, Sound ..... SORTED!
Day time running
If you want to run in the day-time, then I would reccomend running through fields or quiet country lanes. This can help your breathing as it cleanses your aura and also helps to prevent injury as you are running on softer ground. If you feel tired don't push yourself beyonfd the limit, walk and enjoy the scenery. This is something that is not so pleasant to do on the road.
Parlsey Hay - a nice place to run.
Variety
Vary your runs so that you don't become tired of the same old programme. For example a good programme would be to do a short run which includes a tough climb, a long run at a very steady pace and a fairly long run though cross-country.
Music
Music can help to block the mental negativity that comes through struggling or feeling pain whilst on your run. I find dance music helps but it will be different for each person. If you turn the music up real loud when your climbing hills it can help you to really escape away from the intense effort.
Motivation
Set goals and aims - Regardless of how much you eat - the more you run, the fitter you become, the faster you go. Set yourself goals and challenges so that you have some form of motivation when you go out. Use training during the week to prepare yourself for a timed effort at the weekend and keep a record of whether you are accomplishing your goals.
Running is not necesarily an individual sport
I run for a club and though I run for myself and try to achieve certain goals and aims, I am also contributing to a team in the various leagues that they enter themselves in. I know that the faster and fitter I am the more I can help to contribute to their success. This motivates me to train that extra bit harder so that my club can enjoy more success.
Current PB's:
400 Metres - 59 seconds
1500 Metres - 4 minutes, 47 seconds
5 KM - 17 minutes, 55 seconds
10 KM - 37 minutes, 49 seconds
The Runner - What's it about?
Pain mostly. So what's so enjoyable about that then. Well for me it is the feeling of elation when you reach the finish line. The sense of achieving your goals and race aims. The race atmosphere is very exciting and so it is worth putting in the hard training to perform well in them.
Be aware of the loneliness of the long distance runner
It is very easy to put off going out running if you know you are going to be out there by yourself. Running in groups is very enjoyable especially if you reward your hard efforts with a stop to the pub afterwards. The drink tastes all the more sweeter when you've worked hard for it.
Night Time Runner
I prefer to run at night rather than during the day where the pave can be somewhat crowded and hectic. Be careful however to wait a while if your planning to go out after eating your meal. A two hour wait should be more than enough.
Escape into the Hills
I can't stand running along the main road so I try wherever possible to escape into the hills and run through quiet lanes in Holbrook and Makeney. I challenge myself on the two hills of Red Lane (about three quaters of a mile in length) and Shaw Lane (about a mile and a half.) Hill training is a great strength builder and the feeling you get when you've made it to the top makes getting there seem worth while.
Wearing the right gear
Running gear is not only extremely comfortable but it also helps you to run faster as well. Wearing a good pair of running shoes will make you feel like you are gliding along the pave rather than applying pressure to the ground.
Shirt, Shorts, Shoes, Sound ..... SORTED!
Day time running
If you want to run in the day-time, then I would reccomend running through fields or quiet country lanes. This can help your breathing as it cleanses your aura and also helps to prevent injury as you are running on softer ground. If you feel tired don't push yourself beyonfd the limit, walk and enjoy the scenery. This is something that is not so pleasant to do on the road.
Parlsey Hay - a nice place to run.
Variety
Vary your runs so that you don't become tired of the same old programme. For example a good programme would be to do a short run which includes a tough climb, a long run at a very steady pace and a fairly long run though cross-country.
Music
Music can help to block the mental negativity that comes through struggling or feeling pain whilst on your run. I find dance music helps but it will be different for each person. If you turn the music up real loud when your climbing hills it can help you to really escape away from the intense effort.
Motivation
Set goals and aims - Regardless of how much you eat - the more you run, the fitter you become, the faster you go. Set yourself goals and challenges so that you have some form of motivation when you go out. Use training during the week to prepare yourself for a timed effort at the weekend and keep a record of whether you are accomplishing your goals.
Running is not necesarily an individual sport
I run for a club and though I run for myself and try to achieve certain goals and aims, I am also contributing to a team in the various leagues that they enter themselves in. I know that the faster and fitter I am the more I can help to contribute to their success. This motivates me to train that extra bit harder so that my club can enjoy more success.
Current PB's:
400 Metres - 59 seconds
1500 Metres - 4 minutes, 47 seconds
5 KM - 17 minutes, 55 seconds
10 KM - 37 minutes, 49 seconds
Present Dystopia - Experimental alteration for a complete target audience
For once an ant who did very bad things,
Did not expect to be poked with a stick,
By three bigger ants who were just as mean.
But still the cheers roared high and proud,
From the smiling faces of ants in the crowd,
Who laughed when they poked,
And cheered when he howled.
And before the stick was stung into the nast ant's eyes,
They saw his fear and they saw his cries,
But they still roared loud, they did not mind.
The ants thought it best
To fight fire with fire,
Make the nasty ant pay for being such a liar.
And as the nasty ant fell, the other ants began to sing,
But as their smiles grew wide they didn't seem to think,
That they too had become ants who did very bad things.
Did not expect to be poked with a stick,
By three bigger ants who were just as mean.
But still the cheers roared high and proud,
From the smiling faces of ants in the crowd,
Who laughed when they poked,
And cheered when he howled.
And before the stick was stung into the nast ant's eyes,
They saw his fear and they saw his cries,
But they still roared loud, they did not mind.
The ants thought it best
To fight fire with fire,
Make the nasty ant pay for being such a liar.
And as the nasty ant fell, the other ants began to sing,
But as their smiles grew wide they didn't seem to think,
That they too had become ants who did very bad things.
Blog Song - Present Dystopia
Face hung like the rosy bushes of hell
Suffocate its prey.
Ambushed and angry,
Solemn surprise,
And tears fall and liars lie.
This hell is America.
This hell is America.
Eyes and ears aware of the sounds of silent death
Growing closer to the mind which shrieks but
To let out a soft sigh.
As knowledge thickens and anxieties grow
And what can a man think before he's set to die.
This hell is America.
This hell is America.
State that savours barbaric actions,
Unecessary murders and mixed reactions,
To think that pain and death
Will bring peace to life.
This hell is America.
This hell is America.
Suffocate its prey.
Ambushed and angry,
Solemn surprise,
And tears fall and liars lie.
This hell is America.
This hell is America.
Eyes and ears aware of the sounds of silent death
Growing closer to the mind which shrieks but
To let out a soft sigh.
As knowledge thickens and anxieties grow
And what can a man think before he's set to die.
This hell is America.
This hell is America.
State that savours barbaric actions,
Unecessary murders and mixed reactions,
To think that pain and death
Will bring peace to life.
This hell is America.
This hell is America.
The Man who should have been King – A report on Jan Ullrich – My all time favourite Sportsman
I first fell in love with the cycling world during the 2003 Tour De France. Although I had heard many wonderful things about Lance Armstrong, his dominance over the last four years, the way he had beaten cancer despite being told afterwards that he had little more than three per cent chance of survival, becoming World Road Race Champion at just 21 years old age, the way he had revolutionalised a whole different style of riding with his high cadence pedalling. The story of Lance Arsmtrong is one that is easy to make him a hero to a young cyclist’s eyes. It was not however the lean superman from Texas who first captured my attention but rather his super talented nemesis Jan Ullrich. I don’t know what it was but when I saw Ullrich time trial a hilly 29 miles in under an hour in stage eleven of that year’s race and beat Armstrong by nearly two minutes in the stage I was in awe. There was something about that guy, he was as talented and skilful as Armstrong without sharing any of the American’s arrogance or brutality and seemed as optimistic and happy in the face of defeat as he did in victory. As the greatest tour of all time rolled on and the best rivalry since Lemond and Fignon became even more intense, I began to find out more about the enigmatic German.I learned a great deal that surprised me. Ullrich was a superstar cyclist a couple of years before Armstrong’s first Tour victory, having finished an incredible second in his first attempt as a 21 year old and then winning the Tour outright the next year by an amazingly dominant nine minutes. With his tender age and seemingly invincible form in both the mountains and in the time trials, at the time Ullrich was being tipped as the next great man of cycling, a man who had the great, natural talent to dominate cycling in the same vein as Anquetil, Merxx, and Indurain had done before him. In fact the great Eddy Merxx even proclaimed Ullrich to become the first man to win an unprecedented ten tours. The words must have been lost on Jan however, who after winning his first tour, felt a great deal of relief and began to let himself go over the winter. This was a habit that Ullrich would unfortunately fall into time and time again.Back then, his antics which to summarise, included eating badly, partying and cycling 30 miles a day when he could be bothered to, could probably have been attributed to the fact that he was still a very young man. Did he really want to commit his life to training? Was he aware of just how talented he was? The answer is probably not.As his mother said after witnessing her son win the 1997 Tour, ‘Jan is very shy, I don’t know how he will cope with all this attention and pressure.’Despite being overweight (when I say overweight, I mean for a Tour contender, Ullrich has never turned up for the Tour more than 73KG, which considering his 6.2 ft height and incredible muscle mass is an achievement for any mortal to be proud of)Ullrich had still managed to take the 1998 Tour by the scruff of its neck. After the Time Trial on stage seven of that year’s race, Ullrich was comfortably ahead of any rivals in First Place, whilst eventual winner Marco Pantani was over five minutes down, 43rd and already looking out of contention before the mountain stages had begun. What could go wrong for Ullrich who was already at the time the best climber in the world anyway? Well as has always been the case for the Rockstock Rocket, everything had the ability to go wrong and on the Stage 15 ascent into Les Deux Alpes, everything did. That day stage winner Marco Pantani put nine minutes into Jan Ullrich to take the Yellow Jersey and hold onto it until the end. For a great climber like Jan to lose nine minutes to someone on any type of climb was an extraordinary feat and one which some people look back to as the point where Jan began to lose his confidence as a bike rider, a time long before he had ever faced off against Lance.Despite winning two more stages that year including a mountain stage the next day, Jan was not able to claw back the time needed to reclaim his place at the top of the Tour standings and despite being the best rider for the large majority of the race, Ullrich had lost the Tour on one day. Mentally, he had allowed the pressure of defending the Tour to get to him. Had he trained more during the off-season (a phrase which Jan seemed to take to heart), Ullrich wouldn’t have had to struggle to reach race weight and would have won that year’s Tour with ease.I began to discover however that Ullrich was a deeply flawed character, seemingly unable to release his potential on a consistent level. When he had reached his potential previously the results had been extraordinary. Although Armstrong has been the best rider over the past seven years before his retirement, he has always had his team to thank. In 1997 Jan won without his team. Rather than letting his team wither away the opposition on the gruelling climbs, Ullrich would go through the unheard of act of going to the front of the peloton by himself and setting such an unbelievable pace that eventually no one else was able to stay to his wheel. He worked for himself and won for himself. In the modern era no one had ever seen anything quite like it and by becoming Germany’s first long awaited Tour champion, Jan had already earnt himself a legion of fans so early on in his career. Maybe that was part of the problem. Maybe success came too soon for the German. He had not had to work so hard for his success and so why would he have to work so hard for more? The answer is he didn’t and he never scaled the heights of his incredible 1997 Tour Victory again.After the 1998 Tour sorrow, Ullrich found himself injured by the time the 1999 Tour came into view. Many people at the time claimed that Ullrich’s injury was more mental than physical and that he was going through a nervous breakdown. They dismissed him and said that he would never be the same rider that he was once was.Ullrich answered the critics in the best way possible by bouncing back from his injury to win the third and fourth most important races of the year still, the World Championships Time Trial and the Vuelta a Espana. The critics were silenced and Ullrich was once again seen as the man to beat in the Tour 2000, of which last year’s win by Armstrong was seen as a fluke in an admittedly weak field.Armstrong, like Ullrich however had a knack for answering the critics and won that year’s tour from Ullrich with ease. Ullrich had finished second for the third time in his career at only 25 years of age. Despite defeat to Armstrong, Ullrich seemed in awe rather than in annoyance at the Great Texan. After losing to Lance the following year, Ullrich declared that he was invincible and simply too good for the rest of the field.In reality, Ullrich had given up on the battle with Lance before it had even begun. He thought he wasn’t as good as him and so therefore he wasn’t. If he had been as determined and trained as hard as his rival, perhaps we would have seen a different race. Ullrich has always declared however throughout his career that he has had no regrets and would not have changed a thing throughout his flawed career. He said more than once in reference to Lance’s life dominating training regime, that he likes to enjoy a life outside of cycling and have a good time away from the bike.Perhaps after 2001 he was having too good of a time however when in May 2002, a time when most professional cyclists would be fine tuning their form for the Tour, Ullrich was having his driving license revoked for drunk driving. That’s right, one of the world’s greatest athletes was out on the piss like some yob on the streets with nothing better to do than to cause havoc and be a libility towards themselves and others. Ullrich was banned from cycling for six months for taking drugs which he claimed were anti-depressants rather than performance enhancing. He was sacked by T-Mobile and joined Coast-Bianchi, a team who had no money and no other quality riders and who wouldn’t have been able to be part of the 2003 Tour were it not for Ullrich’s presence. With his last great result being his Second World Time Trial victory in 2001, no one really expected anything wonderful from Ullrich who was riding in a second rate team that couldn’t hope to give him the kind of support he would need during a three week bike race. It seemed however that too many people had forgotten that Jan didn’t need a team to win, he just needed himself at top form both physically and mentally and in 2003 he was. It just wasn’t quite enough.I watched that year’s Tour as a 15 year old boy in France myself, mesmorised by what I was seeing. Ullrich never had any team mates with him on the hard mountain stages like Armstrong did but it didn’t matter, he attacked and attacked and attacked again. He was courageous, in phenomenal shape and going into the now infamous Luz Arziden stage, he was fourteen seconds behind Arsmtrong and favourite to win. That stage is one of the most inspiring I have ever seen. Armstrong being brought down by a spectator only to fight his way back into the main bunch and win the stage outright. In how many sports could one man nearly have lost his chance at victory because of a fan. Many people credit Armstrong for his win that day but few credit Ullrich for slowing down when Armstrong was brought to his knees. For allowing Armstrong to make his way in to the bunch and before re-establishing his ryhtm watching a fresh Lance charge his way up the road to extend his lead to a minute. I often wonder whether or not Lance would have been so kind. Given his appetite for success, I think probably not. I lost respect for Lance when he made the claim that he didn’t think that Ullrich had waited for him claiming that he was ‘going at a race tempo’. When I read that in his book ‘Every Second Counts’, I just frowned and thought ‘what a jerk.’ Loads of people are going to read that and believe it because it’s Lance Armstrong.Needless to say when I got back home and had my first racing bike brought for me at Christmas it was not Lance who I was imitating out on the roads. I was Jan Ullrich in my enormous gear, which I stayed in for as long as possible on the hard climbs like he did, my mouth opened like a fish when I time trialled just like his was.He more than anyone ignited my dream to one day become a Professional Cyclist.Which is why it’s a shame that Ullrich’s career has ended the way it has, being convicted of drugs that everyone else is on, being ejected from the Tour he was in great shape to win. Most people would take Ullrich’s career and be more than happy.One Tour win, five times runner up, Two time World Champion, Olympic Gold Medallist, Tour of Spain winner, and seven Tour Stages is an impressive palmares. However double that by two and you still haven’t got anywhere close to what this man had the potential to accomplish. It is a shame that he will be remembered for what he lost more than for what he won.What I find fascinating about Ullrich is the person himself. An unbelievable talent who is also unbelievably humble, a man who has never understood his own abilities, never had it in him to fulfil his greatness, it is his human qualities that make him such a fascinating cyclist and a fascinating human being. As Ullrich recently retires, I think fondly of the man who should have been King.
I first fell in love with the cycling world during the 2003 Tour De France. Although I had heard many wonderful things about Lance Armstrong, his dominance over the last four years, the way he had beaten cancer despite being told afterwards that he had little more than three per cent chance of survival, becoming World Road Race Champion at just 21 years old age, the way he had revolutionalised a whole different style of riding with his high cadence pedalling. The story of Lance Arsmtrong is one that is easy to make him a hero to a young cyclist’s eyes. It was not however the lean superman from Texas who first captured my attention but rather his super talented nemesis Jan Ullrich. I don’t know what it was but when I saw Ullrich time trial a hilly 29 miles in under an hour in stage eleven of that year’s race and beat Armstrong by nearly two minutes in the stage I was in awe. There was something about that guy, he was as talented and skilful as Armstrong without sharing any of the American’s arrogance or brutality and seemed as optimistic and happy in the face of defeat as he did in victory. As the greatest tour of all time rolled on and the best rivalry since Lemond and Fignon became even more intense, I began to find out more about the enigmatic German.I learned a great deal that surprised me. Ullrich was a superstar cyclist a couple of years before Armstrong’s first Tour victory, having finished an incredible second in his first attempt as a 21 year old and then winning the Tour outright the next year by an amazingly dominant nine minutes. With his tender age and seemingly invincible form in both the mountains and in the time trials, at the time Ullrich was being tipped as the next great man of cycling, a man who had the great, natural talent to dominate cycling in the same vein as Anquetil, Merxx, and Indurain had done before him. In fact the great Eddy Merxx even proclaimed Ullrich to become the first man to win an unprecedented ten tours. The words must have been lost on Jan however, who after winning his first tour, felt a great deal of relief and began to let himself go over the winter. This was a habit that Ullrich would unfortunately fall into time and time again.Back then, his antics which to summarise, included eating badly, partying and cycling 30 miles a day when he could be bothered to, could probably have been attributed to the fact that he was still a very young man. Did he really want to commit his life to training? Was he aware of just how talented he was? The answer is probably not.As his mother said after witnessing her son win the 1997 Tour, ‘Jan is very shy, I don’t know how he will cope with all this attention and pressure.’Despite being overweight (when I say overweight, I mean for a Tour contender, Ullrich has never turned up for the Tour more than 73KG, which considering his 6.2 ft height and incredible muscle mass is an achievement for any mortal to be proud of)Ullrich had still managed to take the 1998 Tour by the scruff of its neck. After the Time Trial on stage seven of that year’s race, Ullrich was comfortably ahead of any rivals in First Place, whilst eventual winner Marco Pantani was over five minutes down, 43rd and already looking out of contention before the mountain stages had begun. What could go wrong for Ullrich who was already at the time the best climber in the world anyway? Well as has always been the case for the Rockstock Rocket, everything had the ability to go wrong and on the Stage 15 ascent into Les Deux Alpes, everything did. That day stage winner Marco Pantani put nine minutes into Jan Ullrich to take the Yellow Jersey and hold onto it until the end. For a great climber like Jan to lose nine minutes to someone on any type of climb was an extraordinary feat and one which some people look back to as the point where Jan began to lose his confidence as a bike rider, a time long before he had ever faced off against Lance.Despite winning two more stages that year including a mountain stage the next day, Jan was not able to claw back the time needed to reclaim his place at the top of the Tour standings and despite being the best rider for the large majority of the race, Ullrich had lost the Tour on one day. Mentally, he had allowed the pressure of defending the Tour to get to him. Had he trained more during the off-season (a phrase which Jan seemed to take to heart), Ullrich wouldn’t have had to struggle to reach race weight and would have won that year’s Tour with ease.I began to discover however that Ullrich was a deeply flawed character, seemingly unable to release his potential on a consistent level. When he had reached his potential previously the results had been extraordinary. Although Armstrong has been the best rider over the past seven years before his retirement, he has always had his team to thank. In 1997 Jan won without his team. Rather than letting his team wither away the opposition on the gruelling climbs, Ullrich would go through the unheard of act of going to the front of the peloton by himself and setting such an unbelievable pace that eventually no one else was able to stay to his wheel. He worked for himself and won for himself. In the modern era no one had ever seen anything quite like it and by becoming Germany’s first long awaited Tour champion, Jan had already earnt himself a legion of fans so early on in his career. Maybe that was part of the problem. Maybe success came too soon for the German. He had not had to work so hard for his success and so why would he have to work so hard for more? The answer is he didn’t and he never scaled the heights of his incredible 1997 Tour Victory again.After the 1998 Tour sorrow, Ullrich found himself injured by the time the 1999 Tour came into view. Many people at the time claimed that Ullrich’s injury was more mental than physical and that he was going through a nervous breakdown. They dismissed him and said that he would never be the same rider that he was once was.Ullrich answered the critics in the best way possible by bouncing back from his injury to win the third and fourth most important races of the year still, the World Championships Time Trial and the Vuelta a Espana. The critics were silenced and Ullrich was once again seen as the man to beat in the Tour 2000, of which last year’s win by Armstrong was seen as a fluke in an admittedly weak field.Armstrong, like Ullrich however had a knack for answering the critics and won that year’s tour from Ullrich with ease. Ullrich had finished second for the third time in his career at only 25 years of age. Despite defeat to Armstrong, Ullrich seemed in awe rather than in annoyance at the Great Texan. After losing to Lance the following year, Ullrich declared that he was invincible and simply too good for the rest of the field.In reality, Ullrich had given up on the battle with Lance before it had even begun. He thought he wasn’t as good as him and so therefore he wasn’t. If he had been as determined and trained as hard as his rival, perhaps we would have seen a different race. Ullrich has always declared however throughout his career that he has had no regrets and would not have changed a thing throughout his flawed career. He said more than once in reference to Lance’s life dominating training regime, that he likes to enjoy a life outside of cycling and have a good time away from the bike.Perhaps after 2001 he was having too good of a time however when in May 2002, a time when most professional cyclists would be fine tuning their form for the Tour, Ullrich was having his driving license revoked for drunk driving. That’s right, one of the world’s greatest athletes was out on the piss like some yob on the streets with nothing better to do than to cause havoc and be a libility towards themselves and others. Ullrich was banned from cycling for six months for taking drugs which he claimed were anti-depressants rather than performance enhancing. He was sacked by T-Mobile and joined Coast-Bianchi, a team who had no money and no other quality riders and who wouldn’t have been able to be part of the 2003 Tour were it not for Ullrich’s presence. With his last great result being his Second World Time Trial victory in 2001, no one really expected anything wonderful from Ullrich who was riding in a second rate team that couldn’t hope to give him the kind of support he would need during a three week bike race. It seemed however that too many people had forgotten that Jan didn’t need a team to win, he just needed himself at top form both physically and mentally and in 2003 he was. It just wasn’t quite enough.I watched that year’s Tour as a 15 year old boy in France myself, mesmorised by what I was seeing. Ullrich never had any team mates with him on the hard mountain stages like Armstrong did but it didn’t matter, he attacked and attacked and attacked again. He was courageous, in phenomenal shape and going into the now infamous Luz Arziden stage, he was fourteen seconds behind Arsmtrong and favourite to win. That stage is one of the most inspiring I have ever seen. Armstrong being brought down by a spectator only to fight his way back into the main bunch and win the stage outright. In how many sports could one man nearly have lost his chance at victory because of a fan. Many people credit Armstrong for his win that day but few credit Ullrich for slowing down when Armstrong was brought to his knees. For allowing Armstrong to make his way in to the bunch and before re-establishing his ryhtm watching a fresh Lance charge his way up the road to extend his lead to a minute. I often wonder whether or not Lance would have been so kind. Given his appetite for success, I think probably not. I lost respect for Lance when he made the claim that he didn’t think that Ullrich had waited for him claiming that he was ‘going at a race tempo’. When I read that in his book ‘Every Second Counts’, I just frowned and thought ‘what a jerk.’ Loads of people are going to read that and believe it because it’s Lance Armstrong.Needless to say when I got back home and had my first racing bike brought for me at Christmas it was not Lance who I was imitating out on the roads. I was Jan Ullrich in my enormous gear, which I stayed in for as long as possible on the hard climbs like he did, my mouth opened like a fish when I time trialled just like his was.He more than anyone ignited my dream to one day become a Professional Cyclist.Which is why it’s a shame that Ullrich’s career has ended the way it has, being convicted of drugs that everyone else is on, being ejected from the Tour he was in great shape to win. Most people would take Ullrich’s career and be more than happy.One Tour win, five times runner up, Two time World Champion, Olympic Gold Medallist, Tour of Spain winner, and seven Tour Stages is an impressive palmares. However double that by two and you still haven’t got anywhere close to what this man had the potential to accomplish. It is a shame that he will be remembered for what he lost more than for what he won.What I find fascinating about Ullrich is the person himself. An unbelievable talent who is also unbelievably humble, a man who has never understood his own abilities, never had it in him to fulfil his greatness, it is his human qualities that make him such a fascinating cyclist and a fascinating human being. As Ullrich recently retires, I think fondly of the man who should have been King.
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